News Tour Diary: The Whigs (Part Four - Frankfurt)

Day Four: Frankfurt

Tour diary! Boomshakalaka! Last night’s rock and roll extravaganza took place in Frankfurt and would be our final German show of the tour. After our power troubles in Hamburg, we were determined for the Frankfurt show to smoothest, most technically proficient (technically) show of our lives. We woke early seeking fuel for our mission. After bundling up in our respective long underwear we stepped into the arctic German snow ready for breakfast. In classic Spinal Tap form, we wandered the premises for the eternity of twenty minutes, pushing on gates and exit ways before realizing we were locked inside the arena parking lot. Defeat. Luckily the sympathetic souls in catering had already whipped up some bite size pancakes, eggs, and black pudding to stimulate our taste buds. Black pudding, which strongly resembles a human fecal log, is delicious.

Fueled up and ready to rip we held a dressing room meeting to discuss our battle plans for the evening’s contest. Where could we find the extra edge we needed for tonight’s performance? How could we take the proverbial power back from the malicious, faceless entity that had sucked it from us the previous night? Seeing that the Segway had yet to experience a power deficiency, we decided to extricate power from Mr. Segway and channel it into our own human bodies. As Julian took his inaugural ride on a Segway, Parker snuck into the back lounge where Mr. Segway kept his powering system and plugged his body into the Segway’s power source in order to suck its synthetic juice into his frame. It wasn’t long before the newfound currency swept through the rivers of Parker’s veins leaving him charged and ready to rock.

Charged and eager to shred, we took the stage to the Tomahawk Chop and played our set to an engaged audience of Frankfurters. We experienced no technical difficulties and there was no power struggle. Parker’s charge left him so wired he had to channel his newfound authority into a push up session following the show. It was an interesting and technically proficient show in Frankfurt. Success.