Othello Woolf - Doorstep + Deep Water

Pack your bags kids, show’s over. As I expect you’ve already heard, Prince has declared the internet to be “completely over”. I don’t care where you go, but you can’t stay here. What’s that? Why? Oh, two reasons. The Artist Formerly Known As The Artist Formerly Known As has pointed out that such gadgetry just “fills your head with numbers”, so there’s health and safety to worry about for one thing. And secondly, iTunes won’t pay him the hefty advance he’s used to if he releases his new album through them. Word is Prince’s toast and jam was cold by the time he received it in bed this morning, so expect his chef to be pronounced ‘dead’ within the week.

In any case, it’s highly unlikely that Prince will read these words, or any other written about pop-funk super fan Othello Woolf. This is both a blessing and a great shame.

A blessing because he most likely won’t ever hear or be aware of the existence of ‘Doorstep’, a summation of ‘Purple Rain’ in which Woolf carefully and painstakingly removes everything compelling about that landmark album. Many of the right elements are present – the tight pace, the snap of the Linn Drum and a properly ludicrous guitar solo – but bereft of the melodic invention needed to carry them, each new phrase soon becomes arduous. Woolf seems so keen to nail the particular quirks of Prince’s production style that the track is polished to a dull sheen; where ‘When Doves Cry’s various parts were given room to shine and fade in turn, ‘Doorstep’s instrumentation is packed too close to breathe.

The shame is that Prince won’t ever take note of our glowing praise of ‘Deep Water’, which sounds exactly like his new album might have in our wildest dreams. Woolf’s second a-side uses Prince’s best work as its foundation, assembling slinking guitar and bass lines with the purpose of lulling us into heavy-eyed submission. As Woolf mutters, “Deep water, deep, deep sleep”, we’re barely a beat away from falling into an easy slumber and drifting downriver to Xanadu. It’s also more than adequate proof that Woolf’s debut, ‘Stand’, was no one-off.

Oh, and it looks like we’re still here after all. Sorry Prince, this just isn’t your day.